A War Widow Remembers Her Husband

**A War Widow Remembers Her Husband**
Recently at the funeral for SSG Greg McCoy, MP, assigned to the 410th MP Company, Fort Hood, Texas his wife read the following letter. He was killed by an IED in Iraq on 9 November. As always the ceremony was very moving, but especially poignant was the letter that his wife read during the Service. The letter pretty much says it all about our great Soldiers and families. The letter was published in the Waco Tribune on 21 November. Tuesday, November 21, 2006 Below is a letter written by Lori McCoy, wife of Army Staff Sgt. Gregory McCoy and mother of two. Sgt. McCoy, a Riesel resident, was killed Nov. 9 by a roadside bomb in Baghdad. He was 26. His widow's letter was read aloud during his memorial service Monday. One question has been put before me time and time again in the past week. That question is "Do I support the war?" Although my answer was the same every time, I have felt that I did not fully explain why I answered the way I did. While we were in Germany, my husband told me that if he didn't get the opportunity to deploy, he would not re-enlist. He felt like he was not able to use his training and found himself looking for a way to fulfill that uncertainness inside of him. Deep down, I knew that deploying was what it would take for Greg to feel like a real Soldier. When that opportunity was before us, I was excited for him. He was going to do what he wanted to do and felt their mission was justified. I could not imagine him not being able to participate in something he felt was his duty. Though I worried about him, I knew that he and his unit would do everything possible to ensure their safety and I will never forget the moment of his return from his first deployment. Starting that very day, he was already referring to "when he went back." There was something about deploying that really made Greg feel complete. We have a beautiful family and a loving marriage, and I could never find it in me to try to talk him out of something he felt was so important. Greg definitely believed in his duty first. But before you think that is inappropriate, let me say that the many absences we went through made our relationship stronger, and made what time we were able to spend together even more precious. I never thought that Greg would not come home. To have thoughts like that when your husband is gone would make every day unbearable and I still had two little boys to care for. Through seven years of marriage, I had shown Greg that I was capable of standing on my own two feet and he never doubted my ability to care for us in his absence. Even now, I feel comforted in knowing that Greg not only loved me but trusted me enough to leave us. So now, when I think about my answer to that question "do I support the war?" this is what I say. It's not a matter of whether I support the war. What matters is that I supported my husband in something that was so important to him. I support the other Soldiers who served with him and their families, who share in our sacrifice. I support the Soldiers of the 410th Military Police Company specifically who, despite my husband's death, continue with their mission, because I know Greg would want them to complete it. But I want to pose a question to those who hold the fate of our military in their hands. Will you make my husband's death worth it? He died believing that his mission was right and just. He was never afraid to fight to defend our country and would have gone to the end of the earth if that's where the Army needed him. If we allow our nation to feel like this is a war we cannot win, we are saying that the price paid by my husband and other Soldiers like him was paid in vain. As Americans, we need to make sure that the end justifies the means. To our family and friends and those who have been pillars of support during this time, I want to thank you. But instead of mourning for us, I want you to mourn for the people who were never blessed with knowing Greg. He was a loving husband and doting father. He had an ability to make anyone laugh and I feel regret for those who were never able to see this in him. I know several of you have said that you will always remember Greg. But as his wife, I want to ask you that instead of just remembering him, you never forget him. Never forget his bravery, courage and commitment to our country. Never forget what he sacrificed so that we might have a better life. Never forget that what he died doing he believed in. But most of all, never forget that men and women like him became heroes long before they died. They became heroes when they enlisted.